I used to dream of not being sick anymore. I always knew I would get here but never thought it would take so long. I was so determined to heal myself or die trying. This journey has been so painful, lonely and at times despairing. I literally have fought for my life for a very long time. I remember back in 2009, when the first picture (above) was taken. I had just had my amalgam fillings removed and was in the thick of parasite cleansing. I often looked older and would turn 50 shades of yellow and orange. My liver was struggling to keep up with the toxic overload from the lyme and from parasite die-off. My hair was thinning and my skin was very dry. I was completely exhausted every single day of my life. At one point, I went to see a naturopathic doctor. She took my chi pulse, stared at me and said, “You barely have a chi pulse; you’re living on sheer will alone.”
I believe I am here today because God wants me here. No other reason. I did say that if I got well, I would help those with chronic illness for the rest of my life. So here I am. This blog is only seven weeks old and I am so excited to share all that I have experienced and learned about natural health these last seven years.
The past twelve months have been both amazing and scary. I experienced great success following the Wahls Paleo Diet, Buhner’s Lyme Protocol, with intensive parasite cleansing and by taking other steps toward recovering my health.
Grieving
Prior to this year, I had been sick for over twenty years, and along the way had lost the ability to work, in 2004. There were so many losses during this period of my life. I remember this past summer standing in front of the mirror and wondering who I was, after all this time. My entire daily life for so long had been about survival. Being chronically ill had been my full-time job. Now that I was restored physically, it was a shock – like waking up from a twenty year nightmare and discovering that I needed to build a new life. I asked myself, “So now what?”
At the eight month mark of my remission, I began a time of grieving. It didn’t last long, but it was so painful. I am blessed to have a wonderful psychologist, Sister Mary, who helped me through this process. I had to feel the sadness of so many losses, and the intense anger at being misdiagnosed, medically misdirected and having to find my way alone. I received little useful help and years of damaging toxic drugs from those who were supposed to be looking out for my best health interests. I was now fully awake to the reality of so many atrocities being committed against the very vulnerable of society, of whose numbers I had been one – through misuse of pharmaceuticals, the food industry, toxic beauty products, fluoridated and chlorinated water, debilitating vaccines and with our environment being mercilessly polluted. I could go on and on but I won’t. I have decided to give this bigger battle to God. Let Go and Let God.
Solution focused
I decided to focus on what I have the power to change: like what I put into my mouth – purifying my water, enjoying some sun, getting some exercise, laughing with family and friends, helping others and enjoying each day as it comes. The way I fight back quietly is with my dollars. We don’t have much, but we still have to eat. I take my dollars to organic farmers, and support people doing something amazing. They are producing life-giving fruits, vegetables, meats and eggs. I stopped supporting the pharmaceutical companies seven years ago when I quit all of their toxic drugs, vaccines and mammograms. Instead, I use herbs, superfoods and natural therapies. I support massage therapists, herbalists, chiropractors, naturopathic doctors and psychologists. This is how as a collective we will bring about a change.
De-cluttered our house
We had been in the same house for the past eleven years. Due to my illness, neither of us had the time or energy to undertake such a monumental task. This summer, we cleaned out every drawer, cupboard, closet, storage room, furnace room, empty kids’ room, recreation room and our garage. We got rid of half of our stuff. For me it meant the beginning of something new. It meant out with the old and anything just holding us back. With each item I asked myself, “Do I use this? Do I love this?” And if the answer to both was “no”, then it either got sold or donated. It was sad in some ways to let-go of old memories, yet liberating and healing. Our house feels light and serene now. It feels hopeful! We are moving forward with our life.
Do not fear Lyme
Lyme is just a symptom of a body that has gone out of balance. It is a disease state that can be reversed with proper detoxification and nourishment. Like Cancer, Multiple Sclerosis, or Chronic Fatigue Syndrome it can be put into remission. Chronic infections can be eliminated and then, the body can begin to repair itself with the right nutrition. The body is a self-healing system. We just have to help it along.
Thoughts are powerful
Every day, I told myself that I was healing. Yes, every once in awhile I would get discouraged and yell at God and have a little pity party for one. But those never lasted long. I prayed for direction, courage and strength. The answers always came. Even if I tried something that didn’t end up working, at least I knew it didn’t work and could move on to something else. I always had a plan B, C and D. I got rid of resentments and forgave everyone for everything.
Relapse
I have relapsed twice before, after periods of wellness that were short-lived, lasting only a month or two. I have never had one full year. Someone recently asked me if I was afraid of relapse. I said “no.” I honestly don’t think I will relapse. After seeing my last hair tissue mineral analysis, and not having had any lyme symptoms for twelve months, I think I plan on staying right here. You can view my first hair analysis when I was very sick and depleted here. I am also getting stronger as the months go by, so I know my body is in the rebuilding phase. I can walk about five miles each morning before breakfast.
My life today
People tell me I look so much better and younger now. I sure feel young and vibrant. After living through what I have gone through, each day is a miracle. My youngest is almost eighteen, and my two daughters are now out on their own. They remain my constant source of joy and love. All three have beautiful hearts; they are intelligent and have a wicked sense of humor. My life is being redirected. I continue to work on core childhood wounds and past hurts. I am now socially active for the first time in over 20 years. I have formed many new friendships and enjoy each moment with these beautiful souls. I surround myself with positive people and have eliminated all unhealthy and negative relationships. This has made such a huge impact on my continuous state of well-being. I do the things that I love to do on a regular basis.
Mexico
I have returned to Mexico for the winter. I wanted to give myself some extra healing time in the intense heat and sun. Here, I have a modest apartment in a local neighborhood and am able to live a simple lifestyle that allows me to heal. I am also planning to open a guest house for others that want a place to come and enjoy a paleo diet with lots of beach therapy. I hope to have this up and running in the Fall of 2016.
Never ever give up
Healing takes time. I was sick for so many years. It is said that one needs a month of healing for every year a person is sick. I needed more, and made a few mistakes along the way; this is normal, and we all have to find what works best for us on this healing journey. The journey can be bitter, but the victory is sweet beyond imagining. I have never been so full of joy!
Blessings and Best of Health!
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So many similarities, so thankful you came into my life via your Blog at this time in my healing journey. Cant believe how many I have already referred to your site. Just for good health also and life change. Just today, took a lady to church who I just met a month ago who we now believe she has Lyme and awaiting lab diagnosis. But she said to me today, ” I love the Blog you gave me the site, she has gone through so much and I love how she changed her life through nutrition.” You are encouraging so many to change their life.
I do have a couple of questions that I am curious to know. How did you know and when did you know to stop your Parasite cleanse and stop the Buehner Protocol. Did you continue for so many months after feeling better. Did you taper off or stop cold Turkey.
Also, do you ever eat any processed food? Even for your Birthday? I do find when Juicing and eating only whole real food is when I feel better. Also finding the less synthetic supplements I take the less pain, swelling, mood changes , and skin color changes I have.
Thanks so much and CONGRATULATIONS !!!!!
Renee Turula, Oregon
I stopped the parasite cleanse when I felt like I was cleared. I also continued to cleanse the parasites the entire time that I was on the Buhner’s Herbs. I just felt at the 8 months that I was cleared. I do continue to parasite cleanse every 4 months as a maintenance.
I hardly eat processed foods ever anymore. I do cheat with a sugar dessert about once every 3 months. I have a big celebration coming up on Dec. 1 and will probably have a brownie sundae. I just feel so great when I eat sugar only once every 3 months. It is probably more like how people ate sugar 50 years ago. Occasionaly, recreationally and in moderation. My sweet hubby Tony always tells me that it’s not what you eat once in awhile but what you eat day in and day out that matters.
I’m so happy you are healing and enjoying the blog Renee! Keep going!
HI, im where you were with the parasites and been taking Mebendazole for 3 weeks and i can feel it’s not doing the job … where do you get your herbs, measured by cups?? TY
I get most things from Mountain Rose in the States or Monteagle Herbs in Canada. You can also google bulk, powdered organic herbs and see what comes up in your area. I buy mine by the lb or 8oz bags. They sell in many different weights and at very reasonable prices.